Ep. 134 | R.I.P Nico

[00:00:46] Speaker A: Dialed. Is not able to receive calls at this time. Is not able to receive calls at this time. I thought you never heard that. Nico's dead. Nico could be dead. Probably is dead. Listen, you chase dick Latina women all into the city. You never know what's gonna happen. I'd assume he's dead. He's not here. Supposed to be here an hour ago. Not answering his phone. That's the prompt we get when we call him. I'd say he's dead. He lived a good life, though, you know? Just when the skin was starting to clear up. Just when the skin was starting to clear up. The Lord has to take him. It's crazy because that's all he was missing. Claskin. And then who knows what could have happened. He was actually kind of going a little mini viral. I don't know if it's mini viral. Not that many views. But on Tick Tock, a good amount of views and he had basically every Latina on the planet. I hate when it just plays like you. Hold on, hold on. Do we have an updated video from the sneak man? We might, we might. No, we don't. Yes. He's been posting up these videos being like day two trying to someone to come and find me. Come to Bad Bunny with me. I thought he was gonna do it on the bad brain stuff. He did not. He's sticking with TikTok and he legit got maybe like a hundred ones. Look at this. Kimberly Doobie. I'll go. I live in Puerto Rico already. Is that related to Paul Dubey? Paul Doobie, the wing guy? This girl must be boring. I wouldn't bring her. Everyone in here. Me, me, me. I got travel and stay. Let's look at this girl. Bianca Nicole. Then they don't look like they're bad girls. You know, I'll give you a shiny Pokemon for the ticket. And that just his. He must have just came his underwear when someone said that. Take my mom, please. I'm going with my best friend the same day. I wish I had an extra ticket. And Nico liked it. What a loser. I mean, this is a. This is a pity party. A little bit. I wish we could like. I mean, but potential's there because the girls are in here. So I. Okay, I guess Bad Bunny is way bigger than I thought. I know. I'm old. I'm past this. Bad Bunny does very little for me. There's like one song that I think I like. If it came on fine. I was actually at Mission on the beach in Riviera the other Day. And that's all they play was bad bunny. Now it's a decent vibe, right? Food was good, great burger, great burger. Go over there. It's a decent vibe for that, that young age, you know what I mean? Maybe 20 to 25. They're playing the bad money, they're dancing, you know, they're drinking their Heinekens, they're having a good time, you know what I mean? And I can get down with that because I think that Latino people love to potty. And I respect game respects game, you know what I mean? Game recognized game. So Nico does line up well with these people. Can I say these people? I mean, reach out to me if I'm not allowed to say these people when I'm talking about Latino people, I mean, I feel like I'm allowed to say that. I mean, it doesn't seem like it's a bad thing. But. What do you mean, you people? I just picture someone saying, what do you mean you people? Can losers search is over. I'm here, Violeta. Okay, I'm gonna say something. He might have a few baddies. He might have a few baddies saying they'll come with him. He goes like, confidence kid. Such are so gay, dude. Like his game is so bad, dude. Here's the problem. The, the crying video still exists. It still exists on the Internet. It's a 10 minute long video. He's crying, he's blowing his nose and all that stuff. This is, I, I think it was Marco or his friend Rob. One or the other was like, listen dude, you gotta take this video down just for the simple fact that like if you ever want to get inside another broad, like seriously, you, they're gonna come and see this on your page. He's put, he basically like four videos down. Is this video and going to end up looking at this and they're going to think that this kid's a grade A loser or just like a cuck. Probably because they don't know Nico. So that these girls, that's what they're going to think. And then. So what is really going to come out of this? I don't know. I think he might be the worst documenter. We, I think that we know that on the, on the face of the planet, like he's not good at like, you know, pulling out his camera and doing stuff. So probably not going to get a lot of. We're not going to get a lot of content, I would say, out of the Puerto Rico trip, but he just wants to go and have a good Time. I'm fine with that. Maybe we should. Maybe I should hire some. I'm talking a real, real, real Puerto Rican guy. And I mean every stereotype possible of a Puerto Rican guy. So just imagine the most Puerto Rican guy on the face of the planet. I'm thinking like Razor Ramon. Like Razor Ramonish. I want so much hamburger meat hanging out. I want a chain outside. Greasy here. Just like Razor Ramon. Dude coming out and just filming Nico the whole entire time. Just in the corners, in the corners. I don't even think Bad Bunny's Puerto Rican. I don't look at Bad Bunny. I think he's Puerto Rican. To me, he kind of looks a little Arab. Like he looks like he could be Middle Eastern. That's what Bad Bunny looks like to me. I don't get what people's obsession is with the dude, but I'm a fat, disgusting looking human being, so I don't know why anyone will listen to me. Speaking of music acts, I mean, look at this. Just a. How many people can transition like me? Not many. Justin was actually half decent at it, but he's another one that's dead. He's dead. I give him like 12 to 16 months possible on this earth, tops. I'll probably. The best part is I'll probably die before all of them. But. Well, not Nico. He's dead. Coldplay. Coldplay is playing in Boston Fenway Park. Last night. Was it last night? I think it was last night. And this dude, it's a normal video, this dude is just, you know, he's up there and he's enjoying the music with a girl in front of him. They're hugging each other, they're kind of swaying back and forth. They look like two 50 year old people, right? Coldplay looks, puts their. Throwing the camera on the crowd and the lead singer, I'm pretty sure, pretty sure it was lead singer called them out. It was like. Because they got very nervous when the. When the camera got on. So he called them out and he was like, what, are you guys having an affair? I don't know. You guys are acting weird. Something like this or this is awkward or something like that. Well, it turns out he is the CEO of a company and that is the hr, the head of hr and they are having an affair. I mean way. I'm pretty sure it's Chris Martin. Is Chris Martin the lead singer of Sucking Coldplay? Chris Martin's a knock. Let them. Let them have fun. Seemed like they were having a good time anyways. Why would you call that out? Why Would you just be like, oh, they must be shy. But in the other end, you probably do deserve that if you just flaunting on your wife just like, you know, probably like rubbing your dick up against this girl's ass, you know, to Coldplay songs, a lot of people are making that low hanging fruit joke, like loses like Paul Duby that Coldplay makes bad music. So, you know, that's not the worst thing that happened that night. You know, just the fact that Coldplay is playing music. People that on like Coldplay, Nickelback, Creed, they're losers because they wish they could do one tenth of what these people done. People, people like Coldplay, Creed, Nickelback, they, they like beginning music is what got them famous. And they were unbelievable. Like, they had hits up the ass. If you look at every single person's catalog, like 95% of them, they usually flame out near the end. Like, it's hard to produce good music. It's, you know, not everyone's burnout cozy. It's very hard to just consistently put out bombs, dude. Very consistently. You know, I can only think of a few things, like maybe acdc, you know, I love acdc. They got so many hits. The point is, is that Bruce Springsteens lasts a long time, right? He's got some dog music. I don't care what anyone says about that dog music. Frank Sinatra, there's a ton of songs you want to skip, skip that. So they want to just talk all this about Coldplay, Nickelback, it's just low hanging fruit. They're jealous. They're jealous because they can't do what they do. So. But what I want, if you're going to want to call them a fucking not call him a knock, but I'm pretty sure did Chris Martin. Chris Martin. Wife, yes. Okay, here's what you should get on Chris Martin for. Not his music. You should get on him a. For marrying Gwyneth Paltrow. He was married to Gwyneth Paltrow for like 12 years, 2003 to 2015. He named his kid Apple. Now, I don't know if that's true. I don't know if I'm thinking of the wrong person, but I'm almost 90% their daughter Apple in May 2004. You name your kid Apple, you're a grade A fucking loser. Now you call you. Now you name your kid Apple, and you're calling out somebody else in the stands, blowing up their spot. Scumbag knock. That's what I'd say about Chris Martin. [00:11:23] Speaker B: What do you expect? [00:11:24] Speaker A: He's From Exeter, Brit. This is why we kicked him out of our country, for being honest scumbags. Just bad people, you know, and they think they're the. Because of their accent. Like, oh, they. People listen to them. They're like, oh, they must be smarter because of their accent. They're actually dumber. They're actually dumber farmers with fucking pitchforks. Put them ass their asses in a blender. They never heard of guerrilla warfare. Like, who's gonna just line up when the streets, the war battle and you're just lining up in lines like in a grid, dude, trying to fight people, you retards. All they do is Mel Gibson. And the patriot comes at you with a fucking tomahawk, like, just from all angles and you're fucking dead. That's definitely a true story, by the way. Great movie, great movie. You just think that people are fighting in grids like that. That to me is the funniest thing ever. Like, it's a fucking sim movie. Like that's like it's a sim video game. Like they just can only move. Listen, all's fair in love and war. The fact that the Brits got beat by us is honestly, like ridiculous. Now granted, are we hearing a slanted version of what actually happened? Probably a little bit, but the numbers don't lie. Little girl named Tico, Texas once said that, that the numbers don't lie. They don't. If you think of the numbers, I want to say it was like they out. They outnumbered us by like 20 or 30. 20 or 30 forces? Like 20. Every one of our soldiers was 20 of their soldiers. I will look up that stat now. How many British soldiers versus American? All right, I'm gonna be honest. I thought it was way more. The British army utilized at least 50, 000 soldiers in America. Many more served in other locations like the west indies, Europe and India. 50, 000 doesn't. 50,000 just in a grid, walking around with their horses and their dumb hats. And they were in red, maybe the most notable color on the face of the planet. You're running around in red, like in green stuff and you're just getting picked off left and right. How many American soldiers? Revolutionary. Okay, all right, so this is just me being a. I mean, this is just me just. I gotta get this number right. I can't just sit here and give you wrong information. It's just not what I'm built to do. Okay, so we had about. With. With the army and the militia, we had 40, 000. So they didn't outnumber us 20 to one. So I guess it was a fair fight than I thought. We knew the land. Britain still loses. Doesn't matter. It doesn't matter because you did lose that war. We've been. And then we've been bailing their ass out for ever now. The Queen sucks. Prince Charles sucks. Queen's dead. I'm pretty sure Prince Harry sucks. We'll do the whole. The whole nine. Megan Markle's a loser. You should see her cooking Joe on whatever it's on. I don't think it's on Netflix. My wife watched it a few times. It is. She just like, rhymes weird together. She'll be sitting there and she'll just be like, bowls via holes or something like that. She just like everything that she does. She's like, zest for your chest. And I'm like, what the is she even talking about? She's rhyming random like utensils. It doesn't even make any sense. It's like tongs for your thongs. And she's just like. Like curls for the girls. That's what the she's doing. She's making curly fries. Like, curls for the girls. It's like, well, a guy. I like curly fries. Does that make me a girl? I don't get that nice curly fry. Dude. Who's. Who's turning down nice crispy curly fry? I'm not a big fan when they get like, super potatoey and they're underdone. But a nice crispy curly fry, There's a few things that can beat that. Waffle fry. Yeah. Let me give you my five. My top five fries. My top five potatoes. I want to go potato. Well, no, let's go top five fries. We're going to go style of fry, not who's dishing out the fry. What's this? This is. I mean, this is as tough as it gets. I should. I write it down to think about it? I'm going to go, okay. All right, so this is how we have to put them up. We're going to have to throw waffle fries up there. Delicious fry. Throw me a curly. Then I want a din fry. I'm talking a den fry. Like you see in the roast beef places, like any Greek place. I got like a real thin fry. Like that's trying to be like a McDonald's fry, but it comes in like a super beef dinner. That type of thin fry. Tater tot. I want to take a tater tot. And now it's a childish thing. It's A childish thing. I like more crispy stuff. So like a steak fry to me. I'm not a huge steak fry guy. You throw a plate of steak fries in front of me, I'm gonna eat the whole plate. I'm not a steak fry guy, okay? Just like, I don't love, like, potato y stuff, so. New Bridge. I love New Bridge. They have fry. I eat all the fries I get. So don't. When I say this, don't say like, oh, you don't like New Bridges fries? No, I'm saying it's not my favorite fry. New Bridges fries, by the way, one third of a potato. They have three fries. You get a full potato that's this big and it's a wedge that I probably could have. I probably could have won the Revolutionary War one of these things. Yeah, just give me one New Bridge potato wedge and I could have beat those losers in Britain. So what do I got? I got waffle, I got thin, I got curly, I got tater tot. So now it's this last fry. What do I want to do here? What do I want to do with the last fry? Am I going to miss a fry? And then everyone's going to be pissed at me. I mean, if this was a, if this was a list, I would take my mother's homemade potato fries, where she cuts them up, she cuts them in circles, and she does them with a little bit of onions. Just a delicious fry. Would you call it a fry or potato? It doesn't matter. This is big. This is big things. I mean, you can't just lock me to a list and then people listen to me. There's six E that are listening. They're like, wow, what is Al's fifth fry? Waffle, then curly, tater tot. All right, give me the home fry. I'm gonna take a home fry. I'm gonna take a specific home fry. I almost want to take two different home fries. Because if you're gonna ask me my favorite home fry, it would be. It would probably be from next Deli in Riviera. I don't know why. I don't know if they just jack it with paprika or whatever they're doing to it color wise. I love it, but I really love, like a crispy home fry. Like the ones that look like they're almost double fried. Yeah, home fry. Give me a home fry over as fucking steak fry and a fucking. The potato wedges. Yeah, that's. That's the list. Do I, do I want to rank them? I go Waffle one, then two. Curly tree, tater tot four, and then. Yeah, give me that. Home fry five. I just saw the list. I think it's a solid list. Now I'm getting hungry for being honest. Someone's just running around, running around in the house. Sorry, I was just reading something. So tell me what you do in this situation, because I'm gonna lay it out for you. I'm gonna lay out the situation for you and you tell me what you guys would do Now. Pulling up to my work. I'm in full work clothes, shirt, hat. I'll say the name of the place on it. So I'm pulling up now. In front of this place, in front of where I work, there is a handicap spot. It's. The sign is first of all completely hidden by a tree. Like you can't even see it. You have to know it's a handicap spot. And there's absolutely no one that's handicapped that lives in the building that it's in front of. But it's just been there forever, so. It's been there forever, you know, no one's there. I park on this thing every day for seven to ten hours a day. I'm just in that spot left and right. No one's ever in it. I know no one's in it. There's no even need for it. It's not directly in front of where I work. It is in like a two family behind it. So I know that no one lives there that parks in this thing. It's essentially a free spot that no one parks in. It's basically my reserve spot. There's no one on the street that is handicapped. And it wouldn't make sense even if someone was down the street to park there if they're in front of their own house. So in my mind, someone once lived in this family that was handicapped. They moved from the two family. So now that that spot is no longer necessary, but the city's not going to fix it. Why would they? I wish they could put. Wish they could put like just a picture of me on. On that sign, but out to, you know, put that up to the city. So I pull into work, I'm back there, and I was legitimately just running in. And this I. I'm gonna say it. This cunt, you know, doesn't. Sometimes you just can't. You just can't have a better word than that. It feels great coming out. She was what she was. She was a liberal cunt, I would say. And the liberal part doesn't Matter. The cunt pot matters. I was walking in, and she's like, you know that's a handicap spot. I'm like, yeah, I do know that. Because, you know, obviously, I do know that it's a handicap spot. She's like, okay, you gonna move it? Oh, no, I'm not gonna move it. I'm like, why are you handicapped? You need a. You need a cocktail. She's like, no, I own this building. I said, okay. So now I do an all Mexican standoff. We're looking at each other. I'm looking at her, and I am staring to her soul. The only problem is I have my shades on, so she. I don't think she could tell I'm staring through her soul. I am not moving eye contact with this broad. And she looks at me, she's like, you know, that's a handicap spot. I'm like, I just confirmed to you that I do know it's handicapped spot. Why are you pocketing in a handicap spot? I'm like, there's no one on the street that needs it, and I'm just running it. I was legit running in to go get change. I'll be right back out. But in the meantime, why don't you mind your own business? And you would have thought I basically told her I was going to rape and murder her right in that basement and just take her down into the basement. Rape, murderer, dismember her body. The gasp that was let out of her was, I think I couldn't handle that better. Like, I think people need that reminder every once in a while. Just, hey, mind your business. Certain things, just look to the side. Like, I'm clearly running in, the car's still on. Even though I. I've been getting called out a little bit about my car being on. I think I'm just like a magnet sometimes to people, like, getting aggravated with me. And I don't know why, because it's not like I try to jack people up whatsoever. Not my nature. I really just like to go through life with as little drama as possible. But the turning on the car thing, like, listen, stop worrying about what other people are doing with the car. Like you. I love how you guys think like that. Just because the car is running when you're not in it, you're really killing the environment. Show me the data. I want to see the data on that. I want to see the data. Okay, show me the data. Show me the science on that. You know what's killing me? What's killing me is two weeks straight of humidity so ridiculous that you have to peel my clothes off at night when they, when I get home. Like I legitimately have to take a paint scraper and scrape my underwear off my body. That's how crazy this, this humidity has been. So when I go run in to a store, I'm not shutting off my car. It's not happening, okay? It's not your car, it's not your gas. You didn't pay for it. Mind your business. Don't worry about the environment. Why don't you go do something useful, okay? Go do something useful. Go do your mother's dishes. That's what you should do. And if your mother's dead, good, that's it. That's what I gotta say for that. So, yeah, I'm going into cvs, dude. Cvs. I'm going into cvs. I leave my car on. Are you leaving your car on? Yes, I'm leaving my car on. Another prototypical person that you would see that would get mad about something like this. Why are you leaving Chiron? Why do you care? Is my answer. Well, I care because the environment, you know, you leave any car on. You leaving your car running. Is someone in the car? I'm like, why are you asking a million questions? Lady like, mind your business. She's like, you. Do you understand what you're doing to the ozone layer? I could give a fuck less about the ozone layer. That's it. Walk right in, walk right in, cvs, come back out. I almost wanted to like just pick up a shift at cvs, like a four hour shift and just restart my car. Restart my car. If she knows how I go about my day. I keep my car running for hours in between uses. I don't care. I put, I'll leave my car running. When I go into work, I'll come back out, I'll electronically start it. I am not getting into a fucking death vehicle that is like you're in a microwave. It's just not going to happen. So I would rather kill the fucking environment just so I have a little bit of confidence. Maybe that's selfish me, maybe, I don't know. Maybe I'm the man. Somewhere in between those two things is true. I couldn't care less. And another thing, mind your business. Why do people care what other people do? I don't get it. Like it's not affecting you. If it's not affecting you directly, mind your business. Simple. Dead simple. Let's try to call him one more time, See if he's alive. See if his phone's going. You have dialed. Is not able to receive calls at this time. So what does that mean? I've never heard of it before. I've never heard this thing before. Like, what is this prompt? The person you've tried has never. Is it. Is it a do not disturb? Is his phone shut off? Is something else he has posted on Tick Tock? He knew about this. So that's the question. The question is, is he dead? I'll be honest about something. Me and Mark Lewis. Or Mark Lewis is basically starting a true crime broadcast, and he wants me there just for. To say maybe three words. So I'll be saying, like, three words an episode because A, I can't keep serious, and B, I don't know, just something to do. Right. What do you think this would do for the true crime podcast? If a new true crime podcast. Podcast. A new true crime podcast. Is brother was raped and murdered. Like, he definitely got raped. So Nico's been raped and murdered, and now Marco started a true crime podcast. Do we cover the case? Is it too close to the comfort? Do we go into full blown, you know, hunt mode? I don't know. My question is, was he on Grindr? Was Nico on Grindr? And was he trying to, like, meet up with somebody and then it just turned out to be, like, some Jeffrey Dahmer type, you know? Is Nico's head in someone's fridge? It's a gross head. I mean, he's still got that skin condition. You think they would have just skipped, you know, like, looked at his skin. But see, this is the problem. You clear up your skin condition, and now you, you know, they're, like, failing you even more so now. A serial killer killed you because you cleared up your skin condition. It really does, like, amaze me that. That he was paying that girl, like, 200 an hour, and she's just yawning in his face like, that's all time. I don't think we've been. I don't know if we spent enough time on that that she's just yawning in his face like, A, how boring is he? B, how unprofessional is she? That's the question I think, is what's worse? Is her unprofessionalism worse or is Nico boring her to death? Like, who's more to blame? I don't know. 60, 40. Nico guaranteed. If he was here, maybe I'd skew the numbers his way. King of the rollover. I mean, number one, Nico is king of the rollover. He talked a big game he talked very big game about softball. You know, people saying, you know, he's the best thing. He's the biggest free agent out there. He said it a bunch of times. Then I go to one of his games and he's just weakly rolling over to second base. Out by a mile. Now. Did I pay the umpire? People are saying I paid the umpire. I'm not going to put a comment on that. I'm not even going to address that. Was the discussions had before the game. If Nico has a bang bang play to call Nico out of. I don't remember those conversations whatsoever. Was there conversations to get Nico to flip out? Like do whatever you can to make Nico flip out? I don't remember those conversations. I don't remember any of these conversations. Did I ever hand money to the umpire? I don't think so. I don't think I have. Did the umpire owe me a favor? I don't recall. So I just want to get all that out there. It's clear to me that he's out. So say what you will. You want to say it was set up. And you know, Al's a scumbag and he just wants to get out. Nico jacked up. He just wants to call him out. You hit a weak rollover shortstop. I mean, to second base. Like one of the weakest balls I've ever seen in my life in. First baseman didn't even fucking stretch for it correctly. He's using his wrong foot on the base. Just a. Just a terrible stretch. Doesn't even go for. And you're still out. Co ed softball. The girl fields it perfectly. I believe she underhand throws it in fucking first basement. Got his feet all tangled up. Got his wrong foot. Stretching with the wrong foot. And you're still out. But that's my fault. Apparently. I paid the umpire, you know, handsomely. Maybe that's what I did. I don't even know the umpire. That's the best part. Does it look like I know the umpire in that fucking video? Please. No idea who that guy is. So that had to be addressed. It had to be addressed. This blue fin blowout. I don't know what this thing is. I got a text that you should come up to this bluefin blow. Listen. We get so many texts from this guy Joe from Gloucester. He's got something going on every day. No one's busier than Joe from Gloucester. Nobody. He runs a big time lobster thing, whatever. And he taking. He just owns everything. That's Costa. Like if. If your umbrella ever sniffed a low tide In Gloucester. Joe's probably fucked her. You just tell he's a coxman and he's just running through till. Even though I'm pretty sure he's happily married. I'm just saying just in general, like, he's probably. At one point, he has. He's like, come up to this Bluefin blowout. I gotta look this up. All right. So it looks like it's a fishing tournament, right? This. This thing cuts. Jimmy Rig Chad has won it. Right? I'm looking at a check here now. There's no way this is true. Is this true? They. They pulled in 728 pounds of fish. So it's some type of fishing tournament. I don't know anything about it. All I see them is holding a check that says $162,000. $162,000 to catch fish? And they won by fucking 50. No, 75 pounds. They won by second place at 653 pounds. What were they catching? I'm guessing stripers. I don't know what they were catching. Oh, no, they're bigger than that. So alibi. So I'm just looking at the post that another boat just caught the very first fish of the tournament. Came in at 375 pounds. Okay. Okay. Bluefin blow. This makes perfect sense. It's a tuna. It's a tuna competition. Who catches the biggest tuna, Right? Bluefin tuna. That's. Bluefin's a tuna company, right? It has to be. Yeah, Bluefin tuna. Okay. So whoever got the biggest tuna. So they got the biggest tuna at 728 pounds. It's a great weight. But just the fact they got $162,000. I was absolutely shocked. It looks like there's four guys on the crew. Is it three or four? Yeah, three or four guys in the crew split in 162 Lodge. That's great if that's true. I didn't know. I didn't know that they did this much. I'm actually gonna text Joe now. I gotta text him to find out. Did they really win 162,000? Because it's like, what the am I doing, dude? Is it that hard to catch a tuna? Is it. Is it that hot to catch a tuna? I mean, I guess. Like, I know a boat's expensive. You got many people there. 728 pounds is crazy. But that feels like that's attainable. 20, 20 teams. Someone's walking out with that much money. Yeah. So I'm sending the text. I want to see if that's an accurate number. I was honestly like, okay, I could, honestly, I could see 10, 20. I mean, I know a bluefin tuna. Like, what's what? Okay, what's the rate? Like, what is bluefin tuna go on the market for blue finger tuna Price per pound? Okay, this is insanity. Insanity. I am like, I am not up to games on this. Like, I don't understand. Like, I. I'm reading $200 a pound. I'm reading. They get $200 a pound. Is that possible? I haven't watched. No, it can't be. It's got to be like 12 bucks a po. Okay. So I said, hey, do they really win $162,000 for the Blue fin blowout? Joe goes, no, they won 162,000 for first place and then 100,000 for Calcutta. I'm guessing Calcutta is some type of charity. Charity. That's what I'm gonna write. Do you know what? Calcutta. I just. I mean like this. Every time I hear something like that, it just makes me. It just makes me think, what am I doing wrong with my life? Like my hobbies will never make me that much money. So I guess, okay, it's a chada, so it's really business, but it's, it is a competition at the same time. So I just can't. I don't get it. I don't understand it. 162, 000 seems in a ridiculous first place prize. Why so much money? It's just like in. I get jacked up if I win a golf thing and I get $150 to bound hood, you know, I don't know. He's saying the side betting. This. I. I don't understand it. I don't get it. So now he's saying this side betting, it's. It's the side betting. Each boat can buy in on themselves to catch the biggest fish each day. That was a thousand per boat per day buy in. So they want all that from day two because they had the biggest fish. Day two, they keep it all. 117 boats. OK, so. Wow. So basically. All right, so basically what everyone's doing is they put in a thousand dollars every single day you're in the tournament. You put a thousand dollars up per day, every boat. And then whoever catches the biggest fish gets the whole pot. I love that. Okay, I do love that. I do love like a little pool. That's a little pool action. What the is he talking about? Can you talk on the phone? Because I, I gotta, I gotta get. I gotta hear this. On a, on a thing. Because now I'm thinking, to me, the way he's writing this down, they want 162 plus another hund. He's calm. Joe. [00:42:22] Speaker B: What's up, big boy? [00:42:23] Speaker A: You're on the podcast. It's just me. I, I gotta get. I, I saw that check and I just got so jacked up. I, I need to know more about this thing. [00:42:34] Speaker B: Oh, it's, it's bananas. It's, it's, you know, there's the fiesta and then number two is the, you know, the blueprint. Blow up Gloucester. So that schooner festival. [00:42:45] Speaker A: So that text you sent us earlier in the week, you were being dead serious. I just thought it was one of your, like famous, like, oh, come to Gloucester. They're opening a, a thrift store. [00:42:55] Speaker B: You will never leave the center. Your epicenter of Melrose, Malden Lynn, North End. You just won't come to the North Shore. You hate it there for some. [00:43:07] Speaker A: I, I mean, I went up to Newburyport the other day. That's pretty, that's up there. That's father than you is. [00:43:12] Speaker B: Yeah. You were trying to, you know, go outside. You probably took your wife for dinner or something like that. [00:43:17] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:43:17] Speaker B: You never want to come to Gloucester. I don't know what it is. [00:43:20] Speaker A: I have bad memories of Gloucester just all around, you know, so. [00:43:25] Speaker B: Okay, 117 boats. [00:43:29] Speaker A: Yep. [00:43:29] Speaker B: You know, and you have a range of boats from like, you know, like 23 or 24 foot center consoles up to like 65, 70 foot merits, which is like a 6 million dollar boat, you know, and, and you know, there's a lot of strategy goes into it. Last year there was like a mil, there was probably 40, 50 fish landed. This year was only nine fish. Oh, okay. [00:43:58] Speaker A: Only nine fish. 117 boats. So a lot of just jerking off on those boats. Just twiddling your thumbs up. [00:44:04] Speaker B: There's a lot of angry guys last night. There's a lot of. [00:44:07] Speaker A: I can imagine. So you're telling me. So 162 was the prize money for the tournament. [00:44:13] Speaker B: Yeah. So they have to pay the center. You know, it's not just free to enter. [00:44:17] Speaker A: Right. [00:44:17] Speaker B: I, I, I want to say it was, I want to say it was. Oh, God, I'm guessing I would say between 3 and $5,000 to enter. [00:44:27] Speaker A: Okay. [00:44:28] Speaker B: And that gets you like, you know, there's a lot that goes into it. You get the first night, the captain's dinner and like all the crews, this, they're feeding, you know, lobster rolls and like a huge spread out underneath the tent and with entertainment. Then they leave at 10 o' clock at night, all at the same time from the dock. They can't leave before 10 o'. Clock. That was on Tuesday night. Tuesday night. And then they could fish. They had to be back at the dock by nine o' clock on Wednesday to qualify for the Wednesday Calcutta. Okay, do you guys know what a Calcutta? [00:45:08] Speaker A: No one knows what a calcutter is. You got to explain that. I, I would have said it was an Indian, a charity in India that like Mahatma Gandhi was in. That's what I think of Calcutta. [00:45:18] Speaker B: So the Calcutta is on these big tournaments is a board and you can buy like, you can buy in on your boat that you're gonna catch. So say it was a one day tournament. Just to make it simple. One day tournament. And, and it's a. Say the Calcutta is a thousand dollars to buy in. You buy if you have confidence in yourself and you're kind of like an asshole if you don't buy in. Like, because imagine if you catch the biggest fish and you didn't fucking buy in. I think the guy on day one, the guy on day one didn't buy in on the Calcutta. So I'm not sure if they carried day one Calcutta over today too, or if it was the second biggest fish caught on day one that got that Calcutta money. [00:46:01] Speaker A: I think they should carry it over. I mean, that and that guy should just kill himself. [00:46:05] Speaker B: Could you imagine? [00:46:06] Speaker A: Oh, so bad. [00:46:08] Speaker B: Oh my God. Right? It's insanity. But so, so then whoever, so whoever catches the biggest, it's like, it's almost like a side bet. You know what I mean? [00:46:18] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:46:18] Speaker B: And there's a, and there's a board, but it's public. Everybody sees it. You know what I mean? Everybody's, you know, they're tabulating it's a big board. And this is pretty exciting, especially when they're catching a lot of fishes and they usually kind of, you know, finesse it. So if there's a couple big fish, they'll tell them, you know, wait till kind of towards the end to bring them in so that we could really create some. And it's, it's almost like a real life. It's almost like real life like tv, you know, because there's, there's a lot of money. Yeah, A lot of drama. Like you have to take a picture. They give you, like just before you leave, they give you this picture and then, you know, it says book and blowout 20, 25. You know, I caught this fish. So when you catch that fish, you get to take a picture holding that sign right next to, like, the fish. So you can't, like, you couldn't have caught it two days before, right? [00:47:17] Speaker A: You can't bring it in on ice. [00:47:19] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. You had. You wouldn't have had access to that. To that sign, you know? [00:47:23] Speaker A: Joe, can we. Can we add water to this, to the thing? Can you inject water until it weighs more? Can you add fluid of some sort? [00:47:32] Speaker B: I don't know. I mean, how do. [00:47:36] Speaker A: How do you. Like, how do we rig this thing? [00:47:40] Speaker B: Well, there's been striper tournaments where they found. Guys have had. You know how there's, like, lead weights? [00:47:45] Speaker A: I saw that. I saw one of these things where they came up and then everyone was going wild because they, like, cut the fish open and they had all these lead weights in their hand and they were going nuts. Do you ever see that video? [00:47:56] Speaker B: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, they want to kill the guy. And rightfully so. [00:48:00] Speaker A: I mean, that much money on the line, people have been killed over parking spots. You know, you're talking about hundreds of thousands. It's crazy. [00:48:08] Speaker B: I just can't imagine, like. I don't know, it's just like golf. You gotta have honor. I don't know, at the end of the day, you just don't want people that you would think that would do something like that to enter. Enter your tournament, you know? [00:48:24] Speaker A: I know 100, but 120 boats. There's four people. That's like a thousand people. You're gonna have a bunch of scumbags. [00:48:31] Speaker B: Yeah. You know, there's always. There's always a couple. [00:48:33] Speaker A: There's always a few. So you're telling me they won 162 and then the Calcutta, or is that the Calcutta and the prize tournament together? [00:48:40] Speaker B: No, no, no, no, no, no. The tournament prize first place was 162, and then the Calcutta was on top of that. And I don't know. I didn't look at the boards. I don't know who didn't buy in on the Sunday 2 Calcutta. And again, I'm sorry, I don't know this. You know, again, I don't. I'm not a guy who acts like he knows exactly and said, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's how it works when he doesn't know exactly how it works. I don't know if they carried over day one to day two or this or the second of the first. The second biggest fish that did buy into the Calcutta on day one got that money. So I'm assuming out of 117 boats that a hundred people bought in. Because I can't imagine there's very, very few times where you see if someone doesn't buy the robo. [00:49:31] Speaker A: Right? Yeah. See if they get another hundred on top. That's crazy money. That's nuts. I could see why. It's intense. [00:49:38] Speaker B: That's real money. So one of the guys that we smoke at the cafe that we smoke, smoke with came in second last year, Mickey. And he won. I think he won 62 grand last year. Second place. [00:49:51] Speaker A: That's not bad. [00:49:52] Speaker B: Yeah. And I don't know. Well, second place. See the second place. So what a big swing, right? Second place, you don't get the Calcutta. [00:50:01] Speaker A: Right. [00:50:02] Speaker B: And there was. There was 85 boats in the tournament last year. And second place. [00:50:07] Speaker A: You know, so I'd hate to lose by like a couple ounces too, just knowing I could fucking pour water down this. This tuna's throat, you know? [00:50:16] Speaker B: So there's a weighmaster and he's on the dock. [00:50:18] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:50:19] Speaker B: This huge crane. And then the, you know, the crane and the thing. And. And it's like, you know, like a luggage scale. Yes, like they have that, like, hook. Yeah, that's how it works. And it says there's a digital readout in between the crane. You know, the hook of the crane. There's the digital readout thing and then there's the. Then it's hooked onto the fish. [00:50:38] Speaker A: And then. Do they get to sell the fish after two? [00:50:41] Speaker B: Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah, of course. But so that. That fish is kind of swinging around. And I've seen it where it's like, you know, flux, you know, especially if it's windy, it's fluctuates between like two and three pounds. And what the official weigh master calls it AT is what it is. And they keep. And they keep. You know, that my. My. One of my best friends, Drew Hale, is the founder of the tournament. And he. And he keeps. And he does the announcing on the doc and he says it a million times, like at the captain's meeting, like when he's doing the announcing, what the weigh master says is what the weight is. And there's no argument, like you're not. That's it. But yeah, like, don't, don't. We're not gonna quibble over this, you know, but could you imagine. Could you imagine, you know, a pound? [00:51:32] Speaker A: I know, yeah. That is crazy. And it's been swinging there and you knew it was bigger. And then the waymaster comes in. That's why you might have to grease the way master or just be nice to him, you know. [00:51:43] Speaker B: He had a tough job last year. I mean there's guts everywhere. So he's. They bring in a fish, they got like a chunk of the gill plate. The gill plate is where the head is. And you know, it's like they got a chunk of that and then they have ice stuffed up in the cavity and the way massive. They, they pull it up and he pulls out any of the guts and stuff like that. That could be that they may have left in to gain, you know, five or six pounds or something like that. [00:52:11] Speaker A: Right, okay. [00:52:12] Speaker B: They'll clean it up and take and scrape out any ice and then they get the weight. [00:52:18] Speaker A: Oh, so they take the weight after it's gutted. [00:52:21] Speaker B: Yeah, it's got it. [00:52:22] Speaker A: Oh, okay, okay. That's a good, interesting tidbit. Your wealth of knowledge. What are they paying for bluefin tuna right now? Like if you were to sell it that tuna, would it be like 4 to 12 pounds or is it more? [00:52:35] Speaker B: They were. [00:52:36] Speaker A: How much are they paying for bluefin tuna? [00:52:40] Speaker B: It's the craziest thing ever. Like some you could bring in fish the same day and one if it doesn't have the right fat content but they didn't ice it properly, it could be like $4 a pound. It could be like $22 a pound. I've heard, you know, recently that some fish were getting $22 a pound. I've heard. But I, and I. And but if it's a rat and it doesn't have any fat, the Japanese, you know, the ones that go to the sushi places, right, they want that fat content, you know. [00:53:11] Speaker A: Right. So you're talking twenty a pound. So that's a fifteen thousand dollar fish just to that seven hundred. That seven hundred pound one. [00:53:19] Speaker B: Seven hundred pounds? Yeah. Well, no, it's not that much, is it? Yeah, 700 times 20, it's 14,000. [00:53:29] Speaker A: Oh my God. We're splitting hands. 15. It was like 7:30. It was like 728. The thing. Yeah, that's close enough. [00:53:39] Speaker B: A lot of money. [00:53:40] Speaker A: That's a lot of money. So, so then they get that on top. Okay, so they do get to keep those with my questions. Do they get to keep the fish? [00:53:47] Speaker B: I got one more story to tell you. I think this is interesting. So when I was younger, I've been down the dock here my entire life, right. When I probably like the late 80s, something like that, it was this guy that used to help out one of our fishermen and they would. And they went tuna fishing one day and this guy had a Job with like, IBM back then, right? Big corporate job, making real money. And they went out and they caught a fish. Well, don't. You know, the next day he tells his wife and, you know, they got big money for it, right. He tells his wife, honey, I know how to do this. I'm gonna get a boat. We're gonna. I'm gonna. We're gonna. We're gonna be rich. Catch going out and tuna fish. [00:54:32] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:54:33] Speaker B: So the guy go. Go quits the corporate job, and he goes and buys like 125, 000 boat, which by today's standard, that's like buying a 500, 000 boat. [00:54:45] Speaker A: Right. [00:54:45] Speaker B: And then he goes out every single day fishing. And the expenses to go. To go sooner fishing today to leave the dock and burn the fuel and food and everything else and the help, probably like 500 a day, right. [00:55:00] Speaker A: Because you got to go out deep, right? [00:55:02] Speaker B: Yeah. So it goes out among straight every day, burning fuel, feeding the. Feeding the crew, paying the crew. I don't. Doesn't catch a fish. The wife divorces them. It's like. You know what I mean? It's like. It's like hitting the lottery the first day, and then you're. For the rest of your life. [00:55:26] Speaker A: Right. [00:55:26] Speaker B: Right. You're chasing that high, and you think that you got to figure it out. Your. You're smarter than the. The casinos. You got a system, right. Like knuckleheads, you know? [00:55:38] Speaker A: Yeah. I mean, especially. It's a finite thing. It's not. It's not guaranteed. [00:55:44] Speaker B: No. You could go all year and you could never catch a fish. You never catch a fish the rest of your life. You know, they might. They just had like, incredible luck that they caught that fish right. [00:55:54] Speaker A: That first time, and then he just blew up his whole life. [00:55:59] Speaker B: And it happens all. I mean, it happens. [00:56:00] Speaker A: You know, it's like that Coldplay guy with the HR girl that. That tuna was like. That was like his tuna. He blew up his whole life. [00:56:08] Speaker B: Yeah, that guy. Oh, my God. Yeah, that guy. [00:56:12] Speaker A: You got to be smarter than that. And Coldplay should. Shouldn't blow up his spot. That was my kind of take on it. [00:56:20] Speaker B: How did they know he was cheating? [00:56:22] Speaker A: They said it. Why would you say it? Wouldn't you just be like, oh, they're shy, or just move on to the next one? They're like, oh, what, are these two having an affair? They got to be. That's basically what he said. [00:56:31] Speaker B: I didn't analyze it. Did he have his hands on her tits? Was he cupping her tits? [00:56:35] Speaker A: It looked like, he was just hugging her. I didn't. I didn't see him touching the titties. I mean, if I missed that. Oh, that's what I said. [00:56:42] Speaker B: I said he was definitely driving. [00:56:43] Speaker A: Oh. I said he was rubbing his dick all in his. Under our ass 100%, thousand percent. You know that. [00:56:50] Speaker B: Can you do me a favor? Because I got a boat waiting for me to offload him. Can you do me one favor? [00:56:55] Speaker A: Yeah. [00:56:56] Speaker B: Brendan asked me to make a hoodie for boats and he won't tell me the size. So the whole order is held up until. So can you ask Brendan what size for that hoodie? [00:57:08] Speaker A: Yeah, because he's retarded. I would assume it's a lodge. [00:57:11] Speaker B: But if I make. He wants it custom, though, so I don't want to burn a blanket if it's not the right side. [00:57:17] Speaker A: All right, I'll get you. I'll get you that answer in the next five minutes. Thank you. See you. That show, that show from Gloucester, he's. He's one of the best to ever do it. I wish he didn't live in essentially Canada. You live up in Canada, you know, it's hard to connect, you know, so it's like J. Fine. J. Fine lives in Florida, you know, Sorry. We run the world. This little stretch. We got this North Shore, Boston, North Shore. But yeah, that bluefin. So he's looking. Those people won like 265. Probably closer. Almost closer to three. If you assume the fish that they caught, if you assume that that money may have rolled over, probably like close to 110 boats put into this side part. I love that. I could see why, you know, that money, to me and Joe was making fun of that guy that blew up his whole life. I mean, that's already ran through my head. As soon as I saw that thing. I saw that thing and the whole thing ran through my head. I'm gonna inject this thing with water. I would take every angle. You take every angle. There's no honor when there's money on the line. That's my opinion. You gotta find those edges, you know, a little bit of water in the thing. Oh, I mean, it does live in the water. So how they proven that, how they proven that you injected, you know, 40 pounds of water. One gallon. All I have to do is get one gallon in this thing. Gallon weighs like seven pounds. Is that true? The gallon weigh seven pounds? Yeah, gallon weighs seven pounds. Let me put a five gallon bucket in this thing. Over 750 pounds. You don't think we can just fit a five gallon bucket full of water injected in. We have to. I don't know. There's something we can do. I guarantee it. I'm sure there's a smarter people that have thought about it. But we could rig this thing. I mean, I bet you that's what they were doing. Did they check the bow for needles? That's my question. Do they check the bow for needles or injection or anything like that? I don't think they did. So my question is, is that rig. China company, did they rig it? You know, that's what you got to think about. I mean, this Coldplay thing is everywhere. It's absolutely insane. Like it's legit everywhere. Yeah. So I don't know how much more I got got in me a. I'm starving. I'm hungover. I went to the Blue Brown Jug last night. Brown Jug. It was firing on also cylinders last night. That sausage garlic pizza cooked perfectly. Unbelievable. Those wings, I'm telling you, we put those wings up against anybody. They say they're award winning, I believe them. I don't think that's just like two words they put next to it. I actually believe that those are award winning wings. The beer, Delicious, cold. You gotta love it. They did have two different size pitches, which one clearly had at least a full, maybe two more beers in it. It was like a big square pitcher. I've never seen a square pitcher in my life. And the regular pitches that we were getting were like more of a rounder on the smaller side. So the, the square pitcher really kicked it off. And I just, I felt like I was bodying people on the picture. The pitch is a beer. Like I felt like these. I mean, I was going 2 to 1. It felt like I felt. I almost felt bad at one point. It's like, are they gonna run out of beer? That's how much they were going down. They went down like water. Delicious. Delicious. Everything was good about that place. Good people. I don't know who's running this social media. I don't know who's doing that. I need to step it up. I need to step it up. That's all I'll say. That's it. I'm sure we'll get a text about. I'll get a text about that one. What else did I have? I had something else that I wanted to say. I know I had something else. This is why I gotta write stuff down when you. Your brain's mush. Your brain's mush. That's what I got. I got Mush brain. All I am is I'm essentially. You know what you are as a parent? You're essentially your kid's assistant. That's all you are. You're his kids assistant. You take him where he needs to be. You make sure you got everything he needs. Did you put on sunscreen? Did you put on sunblock? Did you put on bug spray? Did you get your hat? Do you have your things? We're going to this sport. Did you do this? Did you do that? I could see how people get tired of it. I could see why Chris Benoit did what he did. No, for real though, that's all we are, is assistance. Once you accept that as a parent, you'll actually be a lot happier. Like, stop trying to think like you're gonna have this life. You got no life. Listen, if I get an assistant, that person got no life. Dude, that broad's doing everything for me that she can think of. You know, she's going to the laundry, she's getting all. She's going to the cleaners, getting the stuff, she's going food shop for me. That's what assistants do. That's what we add to our kids. It's annoying. It is annoying. So here's what I'll say. When you're a kid, you overlook it. You know, we wrote with the brown. [01:03:05] Speaker B: Jug. [01:03:07] Speaker A: And people we were with were like, oh, we used to go to the old brown joke. And we used to be so mad because our parents, like just let us finish our drinks. And it's true, when you were a kid, you were like, why do they need to finish their drinks? But then you become an adult and you're like, we fucking need these drinks. You know, we need these fucking drinks. And that's what we're telling our kids. Hey, we need to finish these drinks. And then they're going to tell their kids, we need to finish these drinks. The assistants need a fucking time to relax too, you know, And I don't think the parents get enough credit, you know, so my parents didn't get enough credit? Your parents, you don't give them enough credit. It's a battle every single day being an assistant, you know, it's a. I don't even know what I'm trying to say. Like a non appreciative job, that you're just doing all this work. Find grateful little shits. That's basically what it is. All right, boys, we're going to leave it at that. I don't even know how long we went. I can't think of Anything else? I can't drag this out any further. I'm sure I missed about 13 different things. Nico's dead. We know that for a fact. Me and Michael are going to solve it. The search fall at the underscore. Search underscore pod. Follow at NL94. I'll be taking over all Nico social. Since he's dead, he don't need it. At relaxed guy Tano. Follow that as well. Follow at Mark Lewis. Follow at Joey Boats. Go listen to Joey Bolts's album. It's great, dude. It's. It mixes humor and just real deal hip hop skills. Okay? You're gonna love the album. You don't love the way you look too like men's warehouse. Is that. Was that their slogan? You're gonna love the way you look. I don't know. You know, like, you're gonna like the hooks. You're gonna like everything about Joey Boats's album. Fall. Pulling the court, guys. Go ahead. Whatever. Follow Joe from Gloucester. Good morning, Gloucester. If you want just sometimes the blandest content on the planets, but he's like the nicest guy in the planet and he's. If you talk to Joe, he's probably one of the most knowledgeable people in the world. He came on this podcast and he had 75 topics. Just an unbelievable guy. I will never come up to Gloucester, though, because he keeps saying that like, we're stuck here now. I'm gonna go to every city around Gloucester. I don't know what's around Gloucester. Essex. Is that around Gloucester? When you go every place around Gloucester and just never step foot in the city. Never step foot in the city. I mean, this kid, he's making me do work now. Oh, my God. All right, keep it clean. You Fats, you Justin, you Nico. Yeah. See you next week. [01:06:42] Speaker B: Sa.